


When You're Evil

by Writcraft



Category: Buffy the Vampire Slayer, Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Anal Fingering, Anal Sex, Crack Relationships, Crossover, F/M, Fingerfucking, Humor, M/M, Multi, POV First Person, Plot What Plot/Porn Without Plot, Post Hogwarts AU, Post-Series
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-06-26
Updated: 2015-06-26
Packaged: 2018-04-06 06:24:27
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,794
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4211478
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Writcraft/pseuds/Writcraft
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>After the demise of Sunnydale, the Scooby gang have relocated to a new Magic Box.  All is well, until a wizard called Harry Potter appears out of nowhere looking for someone to help him deal with a teething problem at the Ministry of Magic…</p>
            </blockquote>





	When You're Evil

He comes from nowhere, appearing in The Magic Box with a _pop_ and waving a strange looking stick around. Not the pointy sort, thankfully. Something much less threatening.

“I’m Harry. Harry Potter.” He looks harried and keeps staring over his shoulder. “Look, this probably sounds mental but I’m a wizard-.”

“A wizard in a magic shop, how original.” Giles cuts him off and narrows his eyes. He removes his glasses and cleans them. “What exactly are you doing here?”

“We need help.” Harry whatever his name is tries to catch his breath and the word escapes him in a rush. “ _Vampires_. The Ministry’s going mental, Shacklebolt’s going to have my bollocks for breakfast if I don’t find a…something called a ‘Buffy’. They told me to come here, but I’ve been all over the place looking for you. I went to Sunnydale first, or tried to. I nearly splinched myself twice getting here.”

“Not really somewhere you want to go anymore.” Xander takes a bite of his sandwich and continues speaking with his mouth full. “Due to it mainly being a big hole in the ground.” He looks at me with suspicion. “Is splinching an English thing?”

“It most certainly is not.” Giles looks horrified, presumably concerned about the possibility of his kinky past being revealed. It’s always the quiet ones.

I ignore Xander as usual and focus on Harry. “We’ve had a change of location,” I reply. “Vampires, you say? Nasty, fiendish, bloodsucking things. We hate vampires.” I lick my lips and give Summers the sort of look that used to drive her wild. “Or most of us do, isn’t that right, pet?” 

I can’t resist having a dig from time to time. I _am_ supposed to be evil, after all.

Buffy gives me a look. “Aren’t you supposed to be dead? I mean _really_ dead?”

“Broke your heart, didn’t it?” I hope I look as smug as I feel, and I circle Harry making a point of sniffing his neck. He smells like chocolate and has an annoying whiff of heroism about him.

“You’re repulsive.” Buffy pushes me none too gently, and I bite my tongue instead of reminding her I actually quite like that. “Harry Potter.” She turns to Giles. “Is he in any of your books?”

“Not as far as I recall.” Giles looks confused by that, largely because there’s usually a book about everything. “Although…” He opens a dusty tome and squints at it, perching his glasses on the edge of his nose, running his finger down the page. “No…it can’t be…I always thought it was a myth…”

“Like vampires?” Buffy raises her eyes to the ceiling and taps her foot impatiently while Giles continues to mutter. “Giles!”

“Sorry.” Giles smiles and extends his hand to Harry. “Are you the Minister for Magic?”

“Not me, he’s my boss.” Harry accepts the proffered hand and shakes it firmly. “And he’s going to start casting Unforgivables if I don’t bring help. The Vampire Slayer. Buffy. He looks confused. “What _is_ a Buffy?”

Buffy rolls her eyes. “I am.”

“Oh.”

I quite enjoy the look on Harry’s face and the muffled laugh from Giles. I put the little man wizard out of his misery.

“Don’t you worry about it. She saves the world. A _lot_.”

“Isn’t there somewhere you need to be, Spike? Somewhere a little more…sunny?” Xander finishes his sandwich and throws the paper into the bin, missing it by inches and generating a _tut_ of annoyance from Giles.

It’s been ages since I’ve had a decent fight and I’m spoiling for a bit of action, so I put my feet up and shake my head with a grin which is met by glares.

“There’s really nowhere else I’d rather be.”

*

I regret it almost immediately.

Potter’s even more self-righteous and annoying than Summers and the two of them together give me the strangest urge to start eating people again.

“You have a vamp problem,” Buffy asks. She’s all business, already thinking about slaying things. “So you want me to kill them?” 

Summers likes killing things. It’s one of the things that makes me weak at the knees. Unless it’s me she’s trying to kill, of course. Although even then, it has its moments.

“We can’t kill them.” Potter looks horrified, his eyebrows shooting up underneath his fringe. His hair is all over the place, and he has to keep pushing his glasses up onto the bridge of his nose. He’s like a mini-Giles, without the brains.

“Well that’s no fun.” Buffy pouts and sits back, folding her arms. 

Potter shakes his head and looks at us as if we’re all mad. I wink when he looks at me, and it causes his cheeks to flush in a very interesting way. 

“Then you might as well go home. Goldilocks here is all about slaying vamps.” I pause and give Potter a slow smile. “That, or shagging them.”

Potter’s cheeks are bright red now, and it’s almost worth having my blanket thrown over my head and receiving a smack which knocks me off my chair.

“You’re not helping,” Buffy hisses and I pick myself off the floor and wipe the back of my hand across my lip. I think she’s drawn blood. 

“Sounds like you need Red, and she’s not here.” It’s obvious to me that this isn’t about charging in with a stake. It’s going to involve books, research, standing around in circles, holding hands and chanting. I’m bored just thinking about it.

“Red?” Potter rubs his forehead, and blinks at me.

“Willow. She’s one of your sort,” I clarify. 

“She’s a witch?” Potter looks excited. “Brilliant. Shacklebolt told me you were all Muggles.”

“Hey! Take that back.” Xander points a finger at Potter, as if that’s going terrify him into an apology. 

“A damn good one.” I’m not sure why I’m defending Red, but on balance I think I prefer her to Potter. “And _she_ doesn’t need a wand.” I snort and give the strange stick Potter’s clutching a disdainful look, making him pocket the wand quickly.

“Not all of us need wands.” Potter pushes his chair back and shakes his head. “Never mind, this was a mistake.”

“Don’t listen to him.” Buffy stills Potter before he can conjure himself out of the room the same way he came in. 

“Spike’s an ass,” Xander interjects. I give him the finger and he tells me to go fuck myself.

Eventually Giles makes tea and biscuits and everybody settles back down.

It’s so boring, I think I might stake myself through the heart if I have to listen to one more excited do-gooder planning their future heroics. 

I decide to take my blanket and go and find myself a bar that serves decent bourbon to proper demons.

With any luck, I’ll never see Potter again.

*

“This is the kind of place nice young wizards get eaten.”

Potter shows up unexpectedly, looking out of place and confused. He orders a beer and sits next to me as if he was invited.

“So you’re really a vampire?” He looks curious and nudges me. “Why haven’t you bitten me?”

“Because I doubt you’d be very tasty.” I give him a look which makes him blush again. Someone should tell him not to do that around vampires on hunger strike. “Besides, I don’t do that anymore. Not since I got myself a soul.”

“You didn’t have a soul?” He looks confused and shakes his head. “Vampires have souls – at least the ones I know do.”

“Don’t kid yourself,” I mutter. I wonder if he’s one of those people – the ones who read about vampires that sparkle in the sunshine and don’t bite until they’re ready to put a ring on your finger. I hope he knows not all vamps are like that, or he’ll get himself bitten quicker than I can say _dinner_. “We’re _evil_.”

“Not you,” he points out with a grin. “You’ve got a soul. Plus, Buffy likes you.”

“I could be evil.” I order another drink and glare at Potter. “William the Bloody they used to call me. I’ve eaten more people than you’ve had hot dinners.”

“If you’re trying to scare me it’s not working.” Potter sips his beer, his smile widening. “Xander told me your bark’s worse than your bite these days.”

I make a mental note to put something horrible in one of Xander’s sandwiches when I next see him.

“Look, why are you here?” I face Potter head on and gesture to the bar. “You enjoy playing on the dark side do you, Harry?” I lean close and I can practically taste his heartbeat. “You want to come and play in my world for a night?”

His breathing shivers and he shakes his head, his hand on my chest pushing me back. “Don’t flatter yourself. I’ve seen enough darkness to last me a lifetime.”

“Is that so?” I catch Potter’s hand and dip my voice. His pulse beats against my fingertips and the reason for all the blushing suddenly becomes clear. I haven’t had sex since Harmony and that never fully scratches the itch. I haven’t had sex with a _man_ since…well…Angel. “Tell me.”

Now _Angel_ scratched the itch. Not that I ever let him know that, of course. He already thinks he’s God’s gift. Which is ironic, to say the least.

“Not much to tell.” Potter makes no attempt to pull away and I can’t help but be a little disappointed I’m not scaring him. Yet. “I fought a war, and won.”

“Just the one?” I feign boredom. If a bit of wand-waving is as close as Potter gets to darkness, he’s clearly never experienced looking into the mouth of hell.

“I died,” he says, his fingers sliding against mine.

“Who hasn’t?” I catch his hand and still it, pulling him closer and shaking my head. “Now, now. Let’s not get ahead of ourselves.”

“I wasn’t aware we were.” When he laughs, it’s breathless and unsteady. He really does like this, I realise. Men. Me. Maybe even the demon in me – although I suspect he’d deny it just like Summers. Heroes often do, they don’t like to admit they crave the dark places in the shadows. It’s their shame, and their bloody revelation.

“Oh, I think you’re definitely getting ahead of yourself.” I buy Potter a shot and release his hand, sliding my arm around the back of his stool. I let my hand brush against his back and watch his eyes flutter closed. He looks surprisingly edible. I’m starting to like our new arrival.

“And you’re so dark, I suppose?” He steadies his voice and cocks his head to the side. He’s full of youth and cocksure confidence. I like that, too.

“I’m a demon, Potter.” I roll my eyes. “What sort of magic can you do?” I stare at his lips just enough to let him know I might bite them if he’s lucky. “Kinky stuff?”

“If you like.” I can hear his heart beating in his chest and it’s making me salivate. He gives me a look, and speaks firmly. “Enough to fight you off, if that’s what you’re asking. Whether you’re biting me or not.”

“I’d like to see you try.” 

“Well, let’s see.” In response, Potter looks around the quiet bar and mutters a spell which sends me flying across the room. He binds my hands to the wall and flicks his wand twice, sticking my feet in place. A Loose-Skinned Demon in the corner of the bar starts clapping and cheering. I’m definitely biting Potter for this. With a growl, I break the magic holding me in place with my face turning.

“Nearly, but not quite.” I shake my head and turn back to my usual form. His sudden display of magic has made me harder than I care to admit. I've always enjoyed fucking someone powerful, even if they're insane. I stand behind Potter and put my hands on his shoulders, murmuring in his ear. “Besides, if anyone’s getting tied up tonight it won’t be me.” 

“ _No_.”

Potter doesn’t seem phased by my transformation, instead he leans back into me and lets my hands wander over his shoulders and down his spine. I can smell his arousal and the musky scent of light perspiration on his body. I can feel his heart beating beneath my palms and I know he’s getting hard. 

Enough is enough. I’ll take Potter to my crypt if he’s that horny. 

We’ll see if he still wants to play on the dark side then.

*

“It’s not bad, considering it’s…a grave.” Potter winces and looks around, pointing at the television with a laugh. “You’ve got a telly.”

“Of course. You don’t?” I’m starting to think Potter’s quite peculiar and I’m not sure I trust myself around him anymore. His smile is brighter than I expected, and he’s quite handsome if you like that sort of thing. Which I don’t, I remind myself. Much.

“Nope, it doesn’t work with all the magic. Makes the electricity go all haywire. I miss it.” Potter looks mournfully at the television and I shake my head. If he thinks we’re watching Bram Stoker’s Dracula and curling up together with popcorn and rats blood, he’s got another think coming.

“We’re not here to watch soap operas sweetheart.” I run my fingers down Potter’s arm and he shivers. “I thought you wanted me to make you scream?”

He’s out of his robes before I can say Abracadabra and unbuckling his jeans, giving me another broad smile.

“Alright, then. Where’s the bed?”

I have to admire his courage and for a moment, I’m tempted to tell him I sleep in a coffin. 

Because I haven’t had sex in a long time, I decide the time for jokes has passed and wave him downstairs.

“That way.”

*

It turns out that shagging a wizard has its advantages.

Instead of having to search for the lube, a quick spell leaves my fingers slick and ready to fuck a very wanton Harry.

“Eager little wizard,” I murmur. I think he might just like it, because he shifts his legs willingly and lets me push his hands over his hands while I slide my finger into him. I’ve done this enough to remember how it goes. I add a second finger, and fuck Harry slowly with them as he arches beneath me with a groan of pleasure.

I bite down on his neck – not enough to draw blood, sadly – but enough to feel his pulse on my tongue and hard enough to make him cry out and arch his neck back. I think he likes this too. I curl my fingers inside him, and wonder if I can make him scream – in a good way, of course.

I smile against his skin. I love shagging. I love the scent of arousal, and the pumping of blood around the body. I love all kinds of bodies, skinny ones, muscular ones and round ones with curves in all the right places. Potter is short and athletic and his body toned and tanned. He’s smaller than Angel but he molds against body nicely. I relish the way he clenches around me and urges me to fuck him harder, until my fingers pump inside him with force and his toes curl against the sheets.

I’m glad he likes it rough. I’ve never known it any different, except for once when it wasn’t about sex at all.

I slick my cock and slide my fingers from Harry, leaving him stretched and bereft. He claws at my back, and I push him onto his front with one last nibble of his earlobe, catching it between my teeth and palming his cock roughly until he's practically shaking against me. I grab his hips and pull him up against me, pushing his face forwards into the cushions. I give his backside a hard slap which leaves a light mark of my hand on his flesh. He mutters a curse and I can feel him fisting his cock in his hand.

“You like that?” I slap his backside again, and he arches with a cry.

“ _Fuck_ yes.” 

I smile, and push into him with one hard thrust. I pull him back against my body until I’m fully seated, and watch him stretch open to accommodate me. He’s slick with lube and so tight it makes me ache with pleasure. I wrap my hand around the base of his cock and let him know in no uncertain terms that he’s not going to come before I’ve had my fun.

I’m a vampire after all. I don’t intend to let a boy wizard with an enormous smile take advantage of the fact I have a soul.

I fuck Harry slowly at first, letting my arousal build and his desperation increase. The slow thrusts brush the spot inside him that makes him whimper and I know he’s on the edge, desperate to bring himself off. I keep my hand firmly on his cock and knock his hand away when he starts to touch. I’d call him a naughty boy, but I wouldn’t like him to judge me for all the porn I watch. He can judge me for eating people instead, if he wants.

Eventually I can’t hold back any longer, and I bring both hands to his hips. I fuck him with enough force to make him cry out, pushing into him over and over until I’m coming hard inside him. He follows shortly after, with a huff and a gasp as he spills all over his hand.

I slide out of him with a wince and watch his body flex beneath me, taking in the sight of him for a moment. When I've had my fill of making him feel thoroughly debauched, I stretch out and light a cigarette, offering him one. “Fag?”

“No thanks.” He flops onto his back and flashes me a grin. “That sort of thing can kill you.”

“I’ll keep that in mind.” I let the smoke out from the corner of my lips and look at Harry as he starts moving out of bed. “You’re off?”

“I was going for a piss.” Harry looks uncertain. “Should I leave?”

“Hardly.” I stub out my cigarette and give him a look which makes him shiver. “I’ve only just got started.”

“ _Oh_.” Potter’s face breaks into another blinding smile and he laughs. “Good. I’ve got all night.”

“And after that?” I arch an eyebrow at Potter and he shrugs.

“After that, the sun comes up.”

*

“Potter! I’ve been looking everywhere for you, they told me you were-”

I slide up from Potter’s cock and glare at the intruder, another wizard by the look of things – a posh sounding public school boy who looks absolutely furious. I recognise the look easily, and I suspect if he knows how to draw my face will be on his punching bag soon enough.

“Malfoy?” Potter pulls the sheets around us, and his cheeks turn beet red. I run my tongue over his neck and tell him how much I like it when he blushes. “Stop it, fuck. I mean…please?”

“Embarrassed, Harry?” I smirk and sit back, pillowing my head in my hands and making sure this _Malfoy_ can see my hard on from his position. I suspect he can see Harry’s too, from the way his eyes keep darting down to the tented sheets.

“Not embarrassed, just…” Potter groans and rubs his forehead, glaring. “What the fuck are you doing here, Malfoy?”

“Trying to save you from getting _killed._.” Malfoy sounds petulant and he shoves his wand in his robes. “If I’d have known you were getting your leg over instead of trying to do your bloody job, I wouldn’t have bothered. We’re supposed to be partners.”

“Auror partners,” Potter clarifies for me, as if that explains everything. “Not…partners.”

I snort and wave my hand. I couldn’t care less, as long as I get another orgasm or three. I’m not exactly looking for love.

“I’m Draco Malfoy.” The snotty sounding wizard squares his shoulders and narrows his eyes at me. “If I’d have known you liked peroxide blonds this much Potter, our stakeouts could have been a lot more interesting.”

“He’s over a hundred years old, what’s your excuse?” Potter mutters under his breath, presumably in defence of my hair. I give his thigh a squeeze.

“I’m not leaving until you tell me what’s going on.” Malfoy folds his arms and bright pink spots flare in his cheeks.

“I’d have thought that was pretty obvious.” Harry winces and I resist the urge to laugh. Instead I push the sheets back to expose us both and cross my legs at the ankle, giving Malfoy a come-hither stare. He’s really quite attractive, and his skin has a translucency which appeals to me. I imagine running my teeth along it and drawing a little blood.

“Are you joining us?” I ask. Malfoy looks hesitant, but he doesn’t say no. Harry’s breathing quickens and I squeeze his thigh again. “I think he wants you to join us.”

“Potter?” Malfoy’s voice is tight, and his tone brittle and he holds Potter’s gaze for a charged moment. I recognise that look, and it reminds me I really need to try to focus my attention on Summers when all this is done. I convinced her to like me enough to shag me once, after all.

“Yeah.” Potter’s voice falters and he nods, as if he’s struggling for words. “I…err…I think you should join us.”

“Well you don’t have to sound so enthusiastic about it,” Malfoy mutters.

“I want you to.” Potter’s voice is firm, clear and I know he’s smiling. “Bloody hell, Malfoy. You _know_ I want you to. I’ve been a bit obvious about it all, haven’t I?”

I shift and press my lips to Potter’s neck again, his pulse against my tongue. I hear the rustle of clothes sliding to the floor as Potter pushes into my hand with a groan, when I wrap my fingers around his cock. The bed dips and Potter’s cock twitches against my palm.

“You’re exquisite like this…” Malfoy sounds happier now – his voice smooth and teasing. I can tell by the way Harry lets out a hiss of pleasure that Malfoy has found the spot on his neck that makes him say all sorts of filthy things. He looks at me, our eyes meet and Malfoy keeps talking to Potter as he watches me. “I don’t suppose the idea of being fucked by two men at the same time appeals, Harry?”

Harry’s mewl of pleasure tells us it does, and Malfoy smirks.

I knew there was a reason I liked blondes.

_~Fin~_


End file.
